I just want to really engrain in you to find your light. You might not see the good in life right now. The frame of mind you are in and your struggles are temporary. There are happy times in life that we can be grateful for. Even if you don't see the power to change your life, God has you in His hands. Put your trust in God and have faith to pursue the joys in life. Take time to appreciate all of your blessings. Sometimes it's a rerouting that God is doing. Sometimes it is shaping the heart for the future that is best for you. Everything is temporary so why not spend life being happy. Try your best and have faith to move on towards the positive elements in life. Try your best to not grow weary. Find a new perspective if you grow cold. Be open to new opportunities. Every day is a new day where you can become a better version of yourself than you were yesterday. Find what makes you happy. Find your light.  

     It's me again. It's been a year for the books. I am closer than ever to being in an official relationship. It feels good to know that a man is there for me. Not only is a man there for me, but someone who is consistent, trustworthy, kind, and smart. He knows me and I know him. It's like we've met before. To think that in the beginning of the year, I was confused on which direction to take. God has never failed me. I see it all so clearly why it never worked with other men. I think this blog is about to get a bit more interesting. Stay tuned.  

     It's 2023 CurlFriends! Time has gone by so fast. We've been through so much together. I want to thank God for bringing me to this point. When I say that we've been through so much together, I really mean me and God. I really mean, the people closest to me. This is probably one of the first times that you've read a CurlyDollTati blog post. Building a brand has not been easy. Sometimes I'm literally not building it. I have my reasons. I don't always have the time or mental focus to work on my passions. I've got a job that drains me that pays for my housing. My job makes me tired and jittery on my time off. It's really overstimulating. Things don't always work out the way that I plan. I'm sure God has His reasons too. I challenge myself to not give up on me. It's been so long since I've wanted to turn my website into income.  I want you to know that what you see here is all handmade by me and there is no money backing me up. I work full time as a cashier team trainer at a grocery store. It's taken me years to get to this point of 186 digital drawings published on my website. Part of me is ashamed that it's taken me this long to try to get to where I want to be. I must admit, I am still not where I want to be. I feel like my career has run stagnant and dry. The other part of me is very proud of what I have accomplished so far. I started at the bottom. I mean, I had nothing. I come from a single parent household and barely any support. The progress that I can see is not tangible in the eyes of a general audience. My progress is tangible in my own eyes and my own perception. I am proud of myself. I am proud of my hard work. Even though I must forgive myself for not accomplishing my goals and dreams yet, I've tried. That's what matters.  I've not tried hard enough for other people, but I have tried hard enough for me. This year while everyone is making their New Years resolution collage I am taking time to thank God. I will not be creating a New Years Resolution collage this week. Maybe I will change my mind later. I have an old one from 2019 that I'm still working on. I have it hung up in my living room that I turned into a bedroom.  There are a lot of things that I want to happen this year. I've wanted them to happen last year and the year before that. It's tiring honestly. It's tiring to expect certain things to happen and they don't happen because of money and time. I no longer want to push myself to that standard. I just want to follow my peace, be the best person that I can, and get all I can that is right and good out of life. I am Enough.  

     Remove yourself from any and every situation where you are tolerated and not celebrated. If you "can’t leave" right now, plan on it. People may just be tolerating you for what you can do for them. How do you know that you are tolerated? Simply…you don’t feel grace with them.  You might work with them or go to school with them. There may be one specific person that you are constantly needing validation from. They stick around for what you can do for them.  If there is something to benefit you then you might consider working something out so that feelings are more manageable for both parties. It is not healthy to go day in and day out constantly surrounded by people who don't like you. One person that does not like you can make you feel like the whole world does not like you. You deserve to be loved.  Sometimes hatred or indifference is disguised as simply just not being celebratory. You should have people around you that are jumping around for joy at your arrival and in your presence. Those people are not always going to be there, but there is potential for them to be there. Do not lose hope in forming a network of people around you that love you.  Jesus will always love you. 

     God accepts me as I am. In this world there is so much hatred towards women. Not only is there hatred towards women, but there is so much hatred towards women of color. There is indifference and a lack of concern for us in the atmosphere. It sucks and it's hard to cope sometimes. It is especially hard to cope when your own people who look like you are not concerned about you. There is a misconception that Black and Brown women "don't need no man." There is a misconception that Black and Brown women can handle the load. We are strong because we have had to be to survive. We've pushed through. We are still fragile and need love just as much as other races. When we are constantly abused and mistreated it takes a toll on our state of minds. It causes a chain reaction and it causes mistrust. We build our walls and close our doors. Although the perception of Black and Brown women may never be able to change in our lifetime we can still control how we view ourselves and the people who we let into our lives. We must remember that God accepts us as we are so we can heal. We must love ourselves and affirm ourselves a little more than the next woman who gets affirmed every time she walks outside. This may not be your reality but it's the reality of many. I ask that you are respectful to peoples perspectives. Protect the women around you of all races. Go the extra mile to protect the integrity of the Black and Brown women around you. We need kind and understanding people around us even when we are under the influence of our pain. Remember that God accepts you as you are...whoever you are. 

Having a lovely personality is what I desire. My sense of style is unmatched. I treat people kind. Sometimes I see people that look different than me that act crazy. I avoid violence at all costs. I want to keep everyone safe. Everyone who acts crazy or seems lost can be changed. If peoples differences are not violent I don't have to change them. They still deserve the same water and air as me.  Everyone that looks crazy to me has a special purpose. They can be a new person. Everyone deserves to be here. Everyone is deserving of grace. I walk away from situations that make me angry. My love pours out for people unconditionally. Not everyone deserves my time. I walk in purity. Not every nice thing I do needs an audience or my peers approval. I know I can never walk in your shoes, but if you are near me I will be a comfort to you.